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Tweets by attnemployeesHistory we’re doomed to repeat
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Tag Archives: grievances
Re: Clandestine changes made to your workspace in the night
If you’ve ever entered your workstation in the morning and thought, “Surely, someone has been messing with my stuff during the night,” you’ll be pleased and displeased to learn that you are correct. After the rest of the staff goes … Continue reading
PrivaCEO executive privacy sack
(Special offer for A!E readers) The tasks of your job are hard enough without the distractions that come with office life. From yahoos talking about reality TV to superiors and underlings interrupting your concentration with asinine requests, the cards are … Continue reading
Lost: The literal keys to success
Accomplishing anything of merit may be more difficult than usual today, as the Company’s keys to success, were lost sometime Sunday afternoon. The keys had been entrusted to HR’s Phillip Hisey for safekeeping over the weekend; he believes they fell … Continue reading
Aggressive karaoke performance terrifies all
The Legal Department routinely meets at a local bar for team-building activities like drinking, karaoke and yet more drinking. At last night’s karaoke jam, Standards and Practices Manager Reginald Patterson shocked the crowd when he followed a colleague’s sedate performance … Continue reading
Consultants successfully game the system
You know that consultants routinely make twice what you make for similar work, but that’s just the tip of the iceberg. They also enjoy full management support for their projects and, when they’re done, they’re on to their next overpaid … Continue reading
Failure to use “Out of office” auto reply leads to eternity in hell
A recently departed colleague was surprised to find himself in a lower circle of hell, he communicated through a medium earlier this morning. “I was a pretty decent guy, I thought,” Paul Blanch, formerly of Finance, said. “But I guess … Continue reading
Non-spontaneous human combustion, melting servers
The near record heat on the east coast is causing a dangerous level of non-spontaneous human combustion and server meltdowns. In deference to the sun and the oppressive temperatures it’s created in A!E’s NY-area offices, we’re closing down for the … Continue reading
Re: The tasteful nude sketches of employees in our restrooms
You may have noticed tasteful nude sketches of yourself and your colleagues popping up in our restrooms. They’re part of our bold new “What We Think You Look Like Naked” initiative. If you’re unhappy with the artist’s rendering, please send … Continue reading
Attention!Employees 